My name is Karthiga R Ratnam and this is my story
Greater good above all else — Mom and Dad
This one is personal. It’s not about fictional superheroes. This one is about the two real-life superheroes in my life — my MOM and DAD.
This blog is a hard one for me to write. I had to dig deep to find the courage. But I realized it would be hypocritical of me to speak about impact-driven category design without making it personal.
So here goes.
I’m an only child. Growing up my folks didn’t have a lot of money. Whatever money my dad made went to my education. My parents decided that was the impact they wanted to have on this world. ME.
Ours was always a household filled with love and laughter. I always had a choice and I was always included. From a very young age, I was allowed to choose for myself what I wanted to do. Nothing was forced on me. My parents made it very clear I get to decide but I have to live with the consequences of my decisions. They were there to support regardless. But finding the path was upto me. To a 6, 10, 12 year old that sounded harsh. In my first swimming lesson, I learned to float and then started in the deep end. Today, I feel the impact of that lesson.
Looking back I can see how much my father struggled to put food on our plates, have a roof over our heads whilst still paying for my private education. There were many times he could have cut corners to make money. But he never did. Integrity mattered to my parents. It was the example they would set for me.
I was an adult but young when my father passed away. I remember within 60 seconds suddenly having to grow up. I had to stop being the little girl that sat on my father’s lap. I had to be there for my mother. My father used to jokingly say my mother is like a lioness protecting her cub and “heaven help anyone who comes her way”. That day I had to become the lioness and she became my cub.
That protection, that freedom, that love they heaped on me, drenched my very soul and helped me hold my head up high, even in the worst possible situations. That was the IMPACT of their love. It allowed me to be idealistic, naive and see the world with rose-colored glasses. For those wondering, my mom is still a lioness protecting her cub.
I have never had to prove myself to my parents. I remember winning some prize in school and asking them “are you proud of me?”. My mother said we are always proud of you that’s not contingent on you winning a prize.
All my parents asked of me was to try and pay it forward to make an impact. To help others in need. That’s why they sacrificed everything for my education. That was the impact they wanted to make in this world.
My parents taught me values matter. Standing up for what’s right matters. IMPACT matters and we owe it to ourselves to make as many positive ones as we can. I struggle to talk about myself. But the few times I have I saw the impact it had on others. By sharing our stories, we heal and move forward together.
I must confess:
I have remained silent in the face of bullies. But I have also stood up to them.
I have allowed myself to be sexually abused and harassed. But I have also stood up to my abusers.
I have allowed myself to be silenced. But I have also spoken up.
I have stood in the sidelines and let things happen to me. I have also had the courage to stand up for what’s right.
I haven’t always been kind.
I have broken hearts.
I have lost my temper (pretty spectacularly) when I shouldn’t have.
I have fought when I should have made peace.
I have failed more times than I can count. But I have picked myself back up.
I have been weak. I have also been strong.
I don’t like being vulnerable. But I’m learning to be.
I’m not perfect. I’m a work in progress. I’m trying to be better.
My greatest fear, what keeps me up at night? That we will leave the consequences of our actions on this planet for future generations to deal with.
My greatest wish is that we are able to redeem ourselves and history will not judge us too harshly.
I have taken jobs “to find my purpose” in life. I have wondered aimlessly. I always knew I wanted to help people. But I didn’t know-how. Like the authors of Play Bigger would say — I’m a dreamer, a pirate, a misfit. I never quite fit in. I thought purpose was like a divine weapon that would show up at my doorstep. Much like a superhero origin story.
Then I realized, free will dictates that I choose my own purpose. And I #ChooseToHaveAnImpact. Who’s with me?